The nineties were a simpler time. I look at kids these days, playing on their iPhones at ten years old, and I’m thinking – damn, at that age, I was playing with sticks, and Gameboys. I remember the struggle of having to play pokemon red in the strobe of streetlights, navigating a few steps every five seconds, holding the Gameboy up to the window and squinting fruitlessly as the unlit screen. I remember rushing home from school to catch Power Rangers before it started, otherwise I wouldn’t get to see who they were fighting or why. No streaming, no wi-fi, no live pause. Nothing. There was also no CGI, so when the Rangers fought, it was all real, baby. If you too yearn for a simpler time, and want to don your favourite ranger colours, as well as show off your poke spirit, then these tops may just be for you.
I always liked red ranger, the tough sonovagun that he was. It’s only fitting then that his spirit pokemon is Charizard – leading Ash’s team of pokemon in the same way that Jason Scott led the Rangers. He was a Karate Black Belt, and fearlessly tackled any foe, much like the over-zealous Charizard (when he could be bothered, that was). Mighty Morphin Power Rangers hit our screens in 1993, but they’ll live forever in our hearts.
Kimberly Hart was my first real crush. There’s just something so beautiful about a woman who can beat alien baddies into submission. She was a knockout in more than one way. And now, she’s been reincarnated as a sweater with Jigglypuff on it. Cute on the outside, but a total badass behind the scenes? Sounds perfect to me.
The blue ranger was always the smart one. So, I think choosing Blastoise is apt. Even though Ash’s squirtle never evolved into one, he still left behind his life of crime to join the trio on their journey through Kanto. And, if you ask me, that’s a pretty smart move. Ipso facto, Blastoise is a great blue ranger. Your argument is invalid.
Tommy Oliver was the most powerful of the Rangers. So, it’s fitting then that Venusaur gets to rep him. Hey – don’t you dare try and tell me Venusaur isn’t the best starter evo. I will fight you. I will. Don’t believe me? Uch, you’re thinking too small. He is the best UU shadow sweeper, or at least he was for me, clean sweeping so many unsuspecting teams thinking he was a Seed Shuffler. EVs stacked in attack with a HP, Spec Def split running Swords Dance, Seed Bomb, Leech Seed, Protect. One word: powerhouse. Don’t understand any of that? Then you don’t deserve to wear the colours of the Green Ranger or Venusaur anyway.
The yellow ranger, Trini, was described by Zordon as having ‘Lightning hands’. He meant that she had fast punches, but with Pikachu picking up the mantle, it works on more than one level. We all loved Pikachu, the little electric rascal that he was, and if wearing yellow didn’t clash with my hair colour, then I’d buy this. But it does, so I’m going Green Ranger. Still, every Rangers team needs a Yellow ranger like every Ash Ketchum homage playthrough of Pokemon Yellow requires a Pikachu. You know what I’m talking about.
I always loved the Black Ranger. His dance style of martial arts was always so fun to watch, and he always kicked butt. Onix doesn’t really have much in common with him, except for the fact that they’re both awesome – obviously. Onix is an excellent pokemon, and it pained me that they made him a dual ground/rock type, basically rendering him utterly useless against a water and grass types. Sure, he picked up an electric immunity, but in competitive battling, who the heck sends out a freaking Zapdos or Electivire against a rock type anyway? Onyx was shunted into obscurity, but I’ll always remember him fondly, and there’ll always be a spot for him on my team.
Tommy Oliver not only made his debut as the Green Ranger, but also went on to hold the coveted title of the White Ranger, a super powerful member of several teams over the years. Many have donned the colour, and the white ranger has always served as one of the most powerful members of each team. Perhaps timeless then is a good word to describe the white ranger – kind of like a legendary pokemon, like say, I don’t know, MewTwo. If you wear the white ranger outfit, then you need to understand what that means. It’s not just a tee, it’s a responsibili-tee… See what I did there?